Cultivating A Quiet Spirit

more thoughts from The Beauty of a Disciplined Life by Rebecca Gates interspersed with my own notes and quotes I have been pondering.. Your comments of late have paved the way right up to the next chapter on developing an attitude of quietness. I was inwardly thrilled as I read this chapter because it confirmed and affirmed the path God has been leading me down in the past year through His own quiet instruction.

Quiet: free of noise, hushed, calm, unmoving, still, restful, soothing, characterized by tranquility, serene, peaceful.

In order to learn how to be quiet, we need to;

Discover the True Nature of Quietness.
Silence has two interlocking spheres, one inner, the other outer. Inward quietness is foundational to outward quietness. At the same time external quietness is necessary if we want to develop an inner world of quietness. It takes discipline to cultivate the silence of the soul.

“There is always music amongst the trees of the garden, but our hearts must be very quiet to hear it.” Minnie Aumonier

Apart from the cultivation of inner quietness, it is difficult to maintain order and quietness in our external lives for any length of time. We live under the “tyranny of the urgent”, where the quiet promptings of the Holy Spirit are overwhelmed by our hectic lifestyles and the demands of others on our time. All too often we attempt to bring order to our worlds by trying to manipulate external activities. Unless alterations to our outer worlds are prompted by order in our inner lives, the effects will be temporary at best.

Discern the Need for Quiet.
Why do we need it? Through stillness and reflection we learn to know God.

“Thou hast created us for Thyself and our heart is not quiet until it rests in Thee.” Augustine of Hippo.

Cultivating inner and outer quietness is consistent with righteous living. “The fruit of righteousness will be peace; the effect of righteousness will be quietness and confidence forever.” Isa 32:17 A quiet life demonstrates to others the result of godly and holy living (1 Tim 2:3) Life lived quietly from the inside out gives support and credence to the faith we possess.

“The good and the wise lead quiet lives.” Euripides

Discipline Our Lives for Quietness.
It is not enough to know why we need quiet. It is not enough to wish our lives were more orderly and quiet. We need to discipline ourselves, our time, our environments, and our lifestyles to be conducive to inner and outer tranquility. First decide whether or not quietness is a priority. It does not matter that someone we admire makes a priority of quietness. It does not matter that we think quietness ought to be more important to us.

In quiet moments when you let yourself think about it, you recognize what is critically important in your life and what isn’t. Don’t let that which is good crowd out those that are essential.” Richard G. Scott

We must firmly establish quietness as a personal priority. Only then will we be able to put aside the secondary matters that interfere with our higher priorities. Attaining a spirit of quietness involves self discipline. If solitude and silence are truly important to us, our lifestyles will be affected and changed. We will find ourselves saying no to more trivial pursuits. The pace of our lives will probably slow down. Some of the strain and stress of a hurried life will be relieved. And our ordered lives will be a confession of the beauty of the peace of God that passes human understanding.

After a Rest.

When I was ten years old, my mother enrolled me in piano lessons.  Now, many youngsters excel at the keyboard.  Not me.  Spending thirty minutes every afternoon tethered to a piano bench was a torture just one level away from swallowing broken glass.  The metronome inspected each second with glacial slowness before it was allowed to pass. 

Some of the music, though, I learned to enjoy.  I hammered the stacattos.  I belabored the crescendos.  The thundering fnishes I kettle-drummed. But there was one instruction in the music I could never obey to my teacher’s satisfaction.  The rest.  The zigzagged command to do nothing.  Nothing?!  What sense does that make?  Why sit at the piano and pause when you can pound? 

“Because,” my teacher patiently explained.  “music is always sweeter after a rest.”

It didn’t make sense to me at age ten. But now, a few decades later, the words ring with wisdom.  Divine wisdom.

From The Applause of Heaven, Max Lucado

I read this quote in my devotions last week and bookmarked it to share.  It somehow ties in so nicely with the discipline theme I have been pondering, another facet of the give and take, ebb and flow, work and rest rhythm of a disciplined life.  When one has worked faithfully and diligently, rest is sweet.  When one has experienced sweet rest in an atmosphere of calm and quiet, then one can take one’s place at the keyboard of life and position one’s hands to take up the melody with gusto and joy.  That’s how I feel as this day of repose draws to a close and I prepare to turn the page and pick up the sonnet after the rest.

Kitchen Window

reflections from my kitchen window which is all at once a window onto my world and a window into my soul. God is gently reminding me that as I seek to establish peace in my home through discipline, everything I breathe and do must be cushioned, carried and consummated in a spirit of peace.

my girls, in fields of gold, with our yard and my kitchen window behind.

Rectangular pane

I stand here again

hands immersed in a labor of love

window on my world

framing my girls

in gold around and blue above.

Were they to now glance in at me

I wonder just what would they see

a gentle reflection of peace?

Or a woman distracted

distraught face contracted

mechanically meeting these needs.

Cooking and cleaning

shining and sheening

never made for a welcoming home

but a heart undivided

by gentle thoughts guided

will draw them wherever they roam.

Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Collosians 3:15

my contribution to L.L. Barkat’s Random Act of Poetry

A Path to Flight.

So what am I going to do about it, you ask?  Well.  I have goals.  Lots of goals.  I know what I want to do, I know what I need to do, and now I just need the discipline to DO it.  Where to start?  Baby steps.  One little baby step at a time.  And maybe it would be best to start at the beginning.  Of the day I mean.  Because apparently;

The first hour of the morning is the rudder of the day. Henry Ward Beecher

If I want to run a good race, I need to have a good start.  Dragging butt and droopy eyed is not going to get me anywhere fast. BUT…. In order to have a good start TOMORROW I need to ensure I had a good finish TODAY.  Late night frivolities are not going to make me bright eyed and bushy tailed the following morning.  This is my first baby step.  I need to get to bed at a decent hour and get a HEARTY rest so that I can accomplish the second baby step of getting up early earlier in the morning because we all know that “early to bed and early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.” 

Success is nothing more than a few simple disciplines, practiced every day. Jim Rohn

A few simple disciplines.  Go to bed early, get up early, eat  healthy, nourish my soul, exercise, work when it’s time to work, play when it’s time to play.  It’s really not rocket science.

Success isn't measured by money or power or social rank. Success is measured by your discipline and inner peace.  Mike Ditka

Discipline and inner peace.  I think the one really has something to do with the other.

Self-respect is the root of discipline; the sense of dignity grows with the ability to say no to oneself.  Abraham J. Heschel

Oh ho ho… wow, doesn’t this one ring true?  I have a WHOLE lot more respect for myself this week than I did last.

Discipline is remembering what you want.  David Campbell

Good one.  I mean VERY good one.  I think I should put this one on poster board and tack it to  my forehead.

No horse gets anywhere until he is harnessed. No stream or gas drives anything until it is confined. No Niagara is ever turned into light and power until it is tunneled. No life ever grows great until it is focused, dedicated, disciplined.  Harry Emmerson Fosdick

Focused, dedicated, disciplined.  Got it.

That discipline which corrects the eagerness of worldly passions, which fortifies the heart with virtuous principles, which enlightens the mind with useful knowledge, and furnishes to it matter of enjoyment from within itself, is of more consequence to real felicity than all the provisions which we can make of the goods of fortune.  Robert Blair

“Discipline… is of more consequence to real felicity…”  Wow.  Just…. wow.

Now here is my favorite;

Some people regard discipline as a chore. For me, it is a kind of order that sets me free to fly.  Julie Andrews

Oh, do I love that!  Not to see discipline as a clipping of the wings but as a path to flight..  What a paradox, but how true!  I want to fly!

Merry (not Harried) Go Round

Perhaps it is our spirit and attitude toward life and its conditions that are giving us trouble, instead of a shortage of time. Laura Ingalls Wilder

This quote continues to niggle at my brain as I evaluate the way I approach these passing moments of life. There is so much to think about here. Like Joy mentioned in my post On Time, how do the Amish, who don’t make use of all the “time” saving devices that we fanatically employ, do it?? They live life at a much slower pace, not so rushed and frenzied but mercy sakes, they get ALOT more done. Makes me think of the old adage “Haste makes waste.” Looking at my life, I think there is a LOT of waste, despite my busyness. And I’m not just talking about waste in regards to productivity, but waste in regards to leisure as well. As in, not giving myself as much leisure (by this I mean completely undistracted mental, physical and emotional leisure) as I COULD if I managed my time better. I’ll get into that more in another post though, because I’ve been thinking about leisure as well and Grammy’s comment really resonated with that.

As for today, lo and behold would you just look at what came up in the devotional column of my Bible yesterday *grin*. And the funny part is that I can't really figure out what it had to do with the passage in question, but hey, it spoke to me!

America is in a hurry. Time has skyrocketed in value. The value of any commodity depends on its scarcity. And time that once was abundant now is going to the highest bidder.

“Time,” according to pollster Louis Harris, “may have become the most precious commodity in the land.”

Do we really have less time? Or is it just our imagination? In 1965 a testimony before a Senate subcommittee claimed the future looked bright for free time in America. By 1985, predicted the report, Americans would be working twenty-two hours a week and would be able to retire at age thirty-eight.

The reason? The computer age would usher in a gleaming array of advances that would do our work for us while stabilizing our economy.

Take the household, they cited. Microwaves, quick-fix foods and food processors will pave the way into the carefree future. And the office? Well, you know that old stencil machine? It’ll be replaced by a copier. And the files? Computers are the files of the future. And that electric typewriter? Don’t get too attached to it; a computer will do its work too.

And now, years later, we have everything the report promised. The computers are byting, the DVDR’s are recording, the fax machines are faxing. Yet the clocks are still ticking, and people are still running. The truth is, the average amount of leisure time has shrunk by 37 percent since 1973. The averaged work week has increased from forty-one to forty-seven hours. (And for many forty-seven hours would be a calm week).

Why didn’t the forecast come true? What did the committee overlook? They misjudged the appetite of the consumer. As the individualism of the sixties led to the materialism of the eighties, the free time gained for us by technology didn’t make us relax, it made us run. Gadgets provided more time… more time meant more potential money… more potential money meant more time needed… and round and round it went. Lives grew louder as demands grew greater. And as demands became greater, lives grew emptier.”

Excerpt from The Applause of Heaven by Max Lucado.

I have jotted down some thoughts from my current “bathroom bible study” book (should I be blushing?) entitled The Beauty of a Disciplined Life, by Rebecca Gates. Here are my annotated notes on that;

While the practice of disciplining one’s energy keeps a person youthful in spirit, sound in body, and productive of mind there are two stumbling blocks that women face.

There is the low energy woman whose capacity for action and accomplishment is very low and she just can never seem to get going or get anything done. Then there is an extreme “perpetual-motion” type that results in a go-go-go, without ever really getting anywhere. Confusion surrounds this type of person. A perpetual motion person is identified by;

Activity without accomplishment,

frenzy without fulfillment,

dizziness without direction,

“go” without “goal”.

Oh mercy. She did all but sign my name to that one. Although I can really be the first kind of person too. Actually, I think it’s kind of a Mary wanting to become a Martha thing in my case. I’m naturally bookish, contemplative and lazy, so I force myself to be all frenzied when really what I need is balance.

This got long but I want to share one other thing. I’ve been doing something a little bit funny the past 3 or 4 days, but I have found it revolutionary and helpful so I will share it. I am trying to be conscious of that enemy “Distraction”, and also consciously choose to be fully present in the moment. When I find my mind wandering to “other things” I just tell myself (sometimes multiple times until my brain and body respond, relax and return to the task at hand) “I Am Here.” That’s it. It might sound weird, to look at it like that in print especially, but think about it. I’m telling myself “I Am HERE.” My brain, my body, my SELF is here and I want to embrace THIS moment, THIS place, THIS task. If I am cleaning my kitchen, I don’t NEED to be thinking about the laundry that needs to get folded. Just clean my kitchen, fully THERE, fully delighting in the actions and results of a clean kitchen while not being robbed of that fulfillment by thinking of the next thing. I am HERE. I’m not there. When I get there, I’ll be there. It’s been SO helpful.

So how about you? Are you a low energy or a perpetual motion type girl? Where do you feel you stand on the merry-go-round of balance? Centered and enjoying the ride, or hanging on to a couple of rails for dear life as you get flung mercilessly around on the frenzied race of time? That’s how I’ve started looking at my balance chart. Like a merry-go-round. I want to sit in the center, balanced and grounded, enjoying a nice steady pace… not clinging and groping for a handhold as all these rails whip around and allude my grasp.

On Time

Time = life; therefore, waste your time and waste your life, or master your time and master your life. Alan Lakein

Until you value yourself, you will not value your time. Until you value your time, you will not do anything with it. M. Scott Peck

Time flies. It's up to you to be the navigator. Robert Orben

You will never “find” time for anything. If you want time, you must make it. Charles Bruxton

Time is the scarcest resource of the manager; If it is not managed, nothing else can be managed. Peter F. Drucker

The happiest people spend much time in a state of flow - the state in which people are so involved in an activity that nothing else seems to matter; the experience itself is so enjoyable that people will do it even at great cost, for the sheer sake of doing it. M ihaly Csikszentmihaly

Perhaps it is our spirit and attitude toward life and its conditions that are giving us trouble, instead of a shortage of time. Laura Ingalls Wilder

You know that saying “A place for everything and everything in its place”? That’s what I’m working towards in relation to my time. A time to work, a time to play, a time to teach, a time to learn, a time to give, a time to receive. And not to let too much of one crowd out another. I am charting a basic time chart to go with my balance chart and it’s not as difficult as I thought it might be. Some things are just not calculable, and that’s understandable. Other things are though and it’s been really good for showing me where my time is being wasted. I’ve identified my personal nemesis. Curious?

It’s plain old distraction. Not living in a state of flow as outlined in that second to last quote above. Not being completely involved in one activity, but trying to be partially involved in numerous activities. It is not time effective. It means that school ends up taking 5 to six hours rather than 3-4, it means that jobs get left half done and some jobs never get done. It means that I’m not giving the moment my best.

I know I’ve written about this before. Sometimes it takes a long time for things to sink into this thick skull of mine. I’m a continual work in progress, and like others have said, seeking balance is a lifetime pursuit that requires a lot of discipline.

More thoughts on discipline, coming soon.

Little Women

I love this book. I love everything about it. Quite enjoying the movie together with my own little women in the evenings as well. The simple down-home loving of a family that is poor by the world’s standards, but rich in love and grace (most of the time). I relate SO much to Alcott (Jo) that it gives me goose bumps sometimes. Imaginative, outspoken, bookworm, drawn to write, counter cultural, headstrong, and a strangely parallel friendship romance with a bashful, dark eyed Italian.

I just love her because I know we would have been fast friends. “Watching” someone with my own character and strengths and weaknesses is sort of like an out of body experience and very revealing. It always makes me more conscious of how I might appear to others. Today’s particular Jo reference that hit home was;

“Laurie turned red again, but wasn’t offended at being accused of bashfulness; for there was so much goodwill in Jo, it was impossible not to take her blunt speeches as kindly as they were meant.”

I’m prone to be a blunt speaker myself, although I appear to be learning to exercise greater discipline and caution with age . That said, I do hope my goodwill and pleasant inner spirit will be such that they will also make it impossible for offense to be taken when I do speak bluntly. May I be “goodheartedly blunt”. =)

Balancing Act

This post written some time last month over at Small Notebook got me seriously thinking about the concept of a balanced life. Being the intense girl that I am, one of the first things that I do when I start contemplating something is simply look it up in the dictionary. Here are a few of the facets of “balance” that stood out to me;

2. A state of equilibrium or parity characterized by cancellation of all forces by equal opposing forces.

5. A stable mental or psychological state; emotional stability.

6. A harmonious or satisfying arrangement or proportion of parts or elements, as in a design.

9. Equality of totals in the debit and credit sides of an account.

Hmmmm…. good stuff. I like the words equality, stability, proportion, equilibrium. I like them alot.

Here are some great thoughts on balance.

People with great gifts are easy to find, but symmetrical and balanced ones never. Ralph Waldo Emmerson

Happiness is not a matter of intensity but of balance and order and rhythm and harmony. Thomas Merton

Be aware of wonder. Live a balanced life - learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some. Robert Fulghum

We need to maintain a proper balance in our life by allocating the time we have. There are occasions where saying no is the best time management practice there is. Catherine Pulsifer

What I dream of is an art of balance. Henri Matisse

Balance is beautiful. Miyoko Ohno

I’m really being enriched by this train of thought. I’m looking at my life with fresh eyes, realizing anew that I was uniquely designed with God given purpose in mind. I’ve also come to the realization that if I am going to live a balanced life I need to focus. I need to have clear goals in mind and exercise discipline in order to achieve them.

I came up with my own personal Balancing Act;

Spiritual, my relationship with God. This includes the elements of reading (the Word), praying, worshiping and listening to the preached Word.

Ministry, my role in kingdom building, right now this centers on discipling my kids which includes, homeschooling, family devotions, bedtime prayers, memory work, etc.

Work, home management. Big job as this includes the daily chores of not just housecleaning, cooking and laundry but also of running the farm, caring for the yard and gardening. No, my husband is not kicking back while I do all the work. He’s working and renovating this old house and doing all the “big jobs”.

Marriage and Family, relationally investing and connecting with my husband and children on an individual basis. Cuddling, playing, intentionally and meaningfully conversing.

Mission, investing in the lives of others, both churched and un-churched. Right now in this stage of life this is mostly done through hospitality and involves either providing childcare, making a meal, having people over for coffee and conversation, writing an encouragement card, praying for someone, or welcoming families into our home and into our lives.

Me, Taking care of this temple He’s gifted me with. This one has a pretty hefty sub-list that includes things relating to my mental, emotional and physical health. It includes things as unrelated as getting enough water, exercise, spending time alone with friends, reading, blogging, taking my vitamins… you get the idea.

It’s impossible to contemplate balance without recognizing two other factors that are intrinsically coupled with a balanced lifestyle. Time management and discipline. I’ll share more thoughts on where those ponderings have led me soon!

Daily Dose of Food for the Soul

This little list is in the sidebar of my devotional blog. I was tweaking it a little bit today to add some fresh thoughts of encouragement and felt that for some reason I should bring it over here and share it. I have a number of friends in my life who say “I know I should be….” but little things remain stumbling blocks to them, and they just can’t seem to work themselves into the groove of feeding on the Word.

There are many things that keep us from the healthy and rewarding habit of seating ourselves at His banqueting table, lack of simple encouragement and advice being one of them. I, for one, don’t want to be guilty of not doing my part in offering that encouragement and lessons from my own experience. But that’s just my small part. The number one responsibility lies within ourselves and the battle we must rage against that dirty little demon called Procrastination.

So here are a number of things I have found and continue to find hugely instrumental in creating a habit of pursuing, digesting and yes even craving my Daily Bread.

Think of your time feeding on God's Word as a vital aspect of your health and wellness. You wouldn't go a week without brushing your teeth, or eating physical food, don't treat the nourishing of your soul by the Word of God with any less care.

Don't cram multiple chapters if you fall behind of plan, but *do* "back-read" if you have the passion and earnest desire to do so. My habit if I miss a chapter is usually to leave it until that book comes up again the next week (based on my own reading plan) and then read two consecutive chapters rather than the one I am scheduled to read.

Don't be legalistic about the when and how. If you don't get a quiet time in the morning, THAT'S OKAY. Find a moment in the afternoon to grab a drink, sit down and put your feet up, and soak up a chapter. And if that doesn't happen, THAT'S OKAY. Take 15-20 minutes at the end of the day to plump some pillows up in your bed and soak it up before you go to sleep. And if that doesn't happen, IT'S OKAY. Tomorrow is a new day. Don't let the enemy discourage you from spending time in the word TODAY because you didn't YESTERDAY. That's just dumb. Did you get that? DUMB.

If you don't have time to read, meditate. Allow God to bring a passage of scripture to mind and allow yourself to listen. Take time to be quiet in your spirit. While you are washing dishes, folding laundry, vacuuming... cleaning bathrooms.

Spruce things up. Get yourself a PRETTY journal and jot down little things that stand out to you. Use your favourite mug or a pretty glass to pour your favourite drink. Sit in your favourite spot (this could change from day to day and depending on the time of day you read. A sunny spot on the porch in the morning, a wing back chair and a blanket if it's chilly, a garden swing in the shade on a hot afternoon, or plumped up in bed with soft lamplight in the evening. Again, don't be legalistic about the location, pick a happy spot that fits the moment/opportunity.) Oh, and DON'T wait for the pretty journal. Plain lined notepaper or even a crumpled scrap paper will work just FINE until you get one....

Remember while you read, God's word is FOR YOU. yes, it was written to a particular audience in a particular time in history and for a particular reason. But it was also written with YOU in mind, TODAY in mind, and is designed to give you strength and wisdom for the journey.

Claim ONE part of the passage and take it to heart. Read through the chapter without too much introspection at first and see what part most stands out to you. Go back and look at that part more specifically and ask yourself what is in there for YOU?

Ask relevant questions. I usually look at a passage with 2 questions in mind. 1. What does this passage tell me about God's character? 2. What does this passage tell me about humanity (ie, ME, in relation to God? a third and very important question to ask is "What does this passage require of me on a practical level?" Write down one attitude, practice or truth you want you live out TODAY in light of what God has just revealed to you. This is how we take ownership of the Word of God and allow it to relate to us and shape us on a personal level.

Build yourself a monument. As I ponder a passages relevance to me I journal the thoughts that arise. Jotting them down somehow cements my convictions in my mind, almost like laying out stones in a monument so I can go back to that place later and be reminded. I also use those notes to come here and share my thoughts later with others.

Keep your actual quiet time concise. This will help make it more likely the habit will continue to happen on a regular basis. Better to spend 15 minutes in the word daily, than 1 hour once a week.

Don't require absolute "alone" and uninterrupted time (without kids around). If they are around, they can learn to not interrupt you for 15 minutes, just like you spend time with other people when they are around, you can spend time with the Lord with them around too.

Think of God’s Word as a love letter to you. When you read stories of God’s wrath in the Old Testament, think about WHAT love paid the price for all that wrath and how a hand that once smote anyone who dared touch the ark of His covenant now beckons YOU to draw near to the throne of grace. Read everything in light of who God is and how much He loves mankind that in spite of our being so deprived, His love story reaches out, encompasses us, washes us clean, and seeks to draw us near.

May you seek Him, may He be found by you, and may you be blessed on the journey.

Prairie Chick

Simple Pleasures

Hot sunshine, warm sand and cool water

The trailing reflection of a full moon on still lake water

The soothing call of a loon carried over the evening air

Puffy white clouds in a bright blue sky

Beach chairs and friends to share them with

Evening fires and fireside treats

Fellowship and community, people hungry for more of God

gut splitting laughter while tubing in pairs

Late night rounds of Ticket to Ride

7 days of not having to cook or wash dishes

Hearing the phrase, “God is great.” in a song while you’re traveling and hearing your 5 year old son proclaim “better than great!” from the back seat.

Returning home to a cool, clean, quiet house after a full week away

The bunting of a little steer as you feed him milk out of a pail.

Five new kittens discovered in the hayloft

Four beautiful kids who turn the hayloft into a church complete with nursery and play “church” for 5 consecutive hours.

Running barefoot through a summer shower to rescue sheets off the line..

Mmmmm…. such a relaxing and wonderful week I had getting away with my family and friends. Refreshing and renewing in every way. It’s all good. Thanks to everyone who emailed me and said they were thinking of, praying for and loving me. What a blessing! And to think I was so grumpy and melancholy just over a week ago. Now, while the rain pours down outside all is sunshine in my soul. I will slowly begin to make the rounds and catch up with you all as time allows. Time. Something I’ve been thinking about and will share about soon!